This is Scooter.  If you must know, his fully registered name is Scooter Dixie Jackson (a committee decision made at the dinner table  two years ago – after much in-fighting between what became two warring factions – The Kids vs. The Parents). 

Scooter has an older brother, Trevor, a West Highland White Terrier (registered name:   Trevor Chase McPooch – developed in much the same manner as Scooter’s).  I don’t have a picture of him for you right now.  He’s upstairs, under the bed, sulking.

Here’s why …


No, he’s not sulking about the water bottle – it’s the little orange thingy.  Well, not exactly just the little orange thingy, it’s the little orange thingy and my gullibility.  Some days I’m a sucker for most anything.

While shopping with a friend yesterday, I ran across a gentleman demonstrating a Brand New Product for Pets!  Revolutionary, but simple.  One of those “Jeez why didn’t I think about that” kinda things.  It’s a bottle topper for water bottles – for Dogs!  Or rather for dogs while traveling. 

Just think about it! 

  • No messy bowls
  • No sloshing water
  • No thirsty pets in the car! 

Simply screw this simple device to the top of any water bottle, invert bottle and wait for your pet to happily lap  at the rolling ball, which dispenses life-sustaining fluid in a non-drip, no-slop manner Anywhere on Earth!  So Easy To Use!  It even comes with an adapter (adapter?) to insure that your mind-bogglingly-simple device will fit snugly atop any of the NEW eco-friendly water bottles on the market today!  (We were treated to a mind-bogglingly unnecessary review of different types of water bottles and their respective tops – who knew? And who drinks Dasani anyway?)

So for $7.00 plus tax, I bit. 

Came home proud as punch with my new revolutionary purchase and proceeded to perform a scientific demonstration for my husband, knowing that he would be just as flabbergasted as I that he hadn’t thought of it before, either!

I needed the adapter (thank goodness for the adapter) for my icy bottle of Crystal Springs pure mountain water (which, incidently, is purely drained from a public supply water tap in the North Georgia Mountains).  I lined up my boys (who are always deeply interested in anything I do in the kitchen), inverted the bottle, and watched them look at me funny.  OK, so I needed a methodology.

I read the instructions on the back of the package, rolled the ball around a bit to get it wet (helps them get the idea, I guess), then inverted the bottle again.  The three of us watched the water drip on the floor, then my husband and I watched the dogs lap the water up off the floor and reseat themselves, looking pretty proud of their accomplishment.  Scooter even wagged his tail a bit.

OK, Plan C. 

  • Roll rolly ball around to dampen, spread a small amount of peanut butter around the rim to entice dogs, invert bottle (over towel this time – no need to keep wetting the floor).

I’m not sure how Trevor was able to navigate around that wet and dripping rolly ball to finish off the peanut butter without ever getting his tongue wet, but he did.  I think Scooter thought that was pretty funny because that tail was doing about 90 MPH as he watched Plan C unfold.

Plan D.

  • While cooing sweet nothings (ooooo-what a sweet puppy, aren’t you just the BEST puppy EVER), gently grasp dog’s jaw joints between thumb and index finger (you can do this easily with Yorkies).
  • Apply gentle pressure to the jaw joints, not much but just enough to encourage them to part their little lips a bit (caution – beware of any snarling sounds.  If such sounds commence, cease experiment immediately!)
  • Slip ingenious invention just to the tip of the now-parted puppy lips and squeeze bottle gently.
  • Watch while dog beats it up the stairs and slides under the bed, followed by his brother – who apparently isn’t stupid.

It’s been about an hour now and they’re still up there.  So moral of this story?  Don’t buy the Pet Top.  Simply light a five dollar bill and two ones with a match, and use it to start up the charcoal for dinner (or something useful).

Thank you for your time.