Rammer Jammer Yella Hammer

Rammer Jammer Yella Hammer

OMG!  Some days are Just Perfect.  And that, my dear readers, is the end of my obviously biased football commentary from last night.  Work on Monday will, no doubt, be blissful for Moi, the only Alabama graduate in the midst of a festering pod of Georgia Grads.  A very nice pod, please don’t get me wrong.  But festering nonetheless.
 
Today I want to talk a bit about something that has always bugged me – what do the ladies do during the Big Ball Game?  Many go shopping, some hang in the kitchen and keep the football snacks hot and ready, but what about throwing a party within a party – a Girls’ Football Party?
 
Here are some suggestions…..
 
Because we are, after all, supportive and loving toward our (otherwise wonderful) Foaming-at-the-Mouth Football-Loving Significant Others, we will be sure to provide them with their FDA-approved Minimum Daily Requirements of Carbohydrates and Cheese-flavored fats.  The fine folks at the Big Grocery Chains have made this considerably easier by providing the following in conveniently pre-packaged, pre-prepared form…
 
Beef jerky
Roasted or Parched Peanuts
Cheetos
Spicy Flavored Dorito Chips
Small sausages and cubed cheese (in the deli section – refrigerator case)
Seven layer dip, already layered and ready to go (same deli section, same case)
Meatballs (in the frozen foods section – just add barbecue sauce and grape jelly and serve in the crock pot)
 
In the Big Screen TV Room, lay down a large drop cloth (you can find Visqueen rather cheaply at the hardware store – comes in rolls), back the pickup truck to the outside door so the dropped tailgate just touches the door frame, lay out the carbs and the pseudo cheese delicacies in the truck bed, surrounded by several large-sized rolls of Bounty Extra Hefty paper towels, drop the two coolers of assorted Iced Football Beers just underneath the tailgate and right next to the Utility-Sized Trash Bin, lock them in and run like crazy to your Girl Party in the other room!
 
BTW, serve everything on disposable goods (except for the crock pot, of course).  Makes clean-up a breeze! Throw everything onto the floor (if it isn’t already there) atop the Visqueen, roll up and dispose!  You can do you Eco-Friendly Thing double-time all next week to make up for it.
 
 (word to the wise – if no bathroom facilities are conveniently available in the aforementioned TV room, leave a space between the tailgate of the truck and the door frame.  Let ’em “go” out in the yard if you have to)
 
Now, necessities resolved, let’s turn to our little Girls’ Party!
 
Martinis are nice, small finger foods and a good ole rousing round of Bunko!  Let’s look at the details…
 
Head to your local Wal Mart or Target and browse the glassware aisles.  You can find perfectly fine Martini glasses at reasonable prices there.  Or if there’s just a few of you, go for the uniquely chic glasses.  If there are a ton of you participating, yes ma’am, they come in plastic.  OR – here’s an idea – have everyone bring their OWN martini glass (BYOMG).  That’s kinda fun and it also helps everyone keep up with their own glass, which can become an issue toward the fourth quarter of a good game (or even a bad one, for that matter). 
 
Next head over to this link and study the recipes.  Select three – one traditional and two “fun” (chocolate is always a cool one to add) and stick to those … http://www.swankmartini.com/martini_recipes.htm
 
 
 If anyone in the girls group finds themselves craving the carbo-faux cheese diet, they can sneak into the Men’s Room under the guise of “checking on the food” and have their fill.  None of that nonsense will be allowed in the Girls Room.  Try these little tasties on for size…
 
  • Jazz it up by tying each little tasty bundle with a green onion bow instead of the suggested toothpick!  “Julie-Ann” little green onions into tiny slivers length-wise, and tie around the bundle in a bow.  Cute and edible!
  • You can do the same thing using proscuitto or thinly sliced ham
  • You can also substitute cream cheese for the horseradish, or mix a little horseradish into your cream cheese

Tiny ham and swiss rolls … http://keyingredient.com/recipes/34733/appetizer-ham-sandwiches/

  • Skip the horseradish mustard in this recipe and just use regular mustard
  • Mix the “spread” part of this recipe a day in advance for maximum flavor-meld

Veggie platter

  • Grape tomatoes
  • Thinly sliced yellow squash
  • Cucumbers (and for god’s sake, please peel them before slicing)
  • Cauliflower
  • Broccoli
  • Green Goddess salad dressing for the “dip” (only common people use Ranch anymore)

Brie and Green Apple Tray

  • Find a nice, large round of creamy, ripe brie and set it center plate on your serving dish
  • Surround half way around with green apple slices (get the bagged kind so they don’t turn brown)
  • Surround the other half way round with Water Crackers – whole wheat variety

Here’s how to play and what you’ll need to set up http://www.howtodothings.com/hobbies/a3001-how-to-play-bunko.html

Ask your girlfriends to bring over their card tables.

And here are some cool and inexpensive Bunko “prizes” (which kinda tie into the theme of the Girls’ Football Party)

   Let’s Celebrate!     You can either give one as a prize, or have one for everybody as a Party Favor.  If you’re really crafty, replace the white ribbon with one in your school color (in my case, Crimson Tide Red).  And if you’re really optimistic about the outcome of the game, have a paint pen handy in the same color, and write the score and the date on the ice bucket.  But then again, this IS a Martini Party.  You might need to nominate a Designated Paint Pen Driver in advance.

 

And since it’s a Martini Party

Do the ribbon thing in your school color if you’re feeling it.

In order to form a more perfect relationship, time your Bunko Party to conclude at the end of the Third Quarter of the Big Football Game.  By that time you and your girl friends have had fun, food, and certainly enough martinis to recover your graciousness.  So head back to the Big TV venue and settle in next to your sweetie to enjoy, or commiserate  the final Quarter of the Game.  Be sure to bring a damp paper towel or two – the Cheetos might be a’flyin!

Please Celebrate Something Everyday!  (and, god bless ’em, Roll Tide Roll!)

 OK, I can’t stop.  Read this absolutely fabulous, extremely well-written article on ESPN.com.  I am now in love with the author…

http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/columns/story?columnist=forde_pat&id=3613594&sportCat=ncf

It made me happy-cry!

 

 

 
 
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